A. Assume Your Child is Able
We have no way of predicting how each individual child will respond
to this or any instructional program. Each child has different strengths
and passions. However, research shows that one of the most important
factors for learning success is a parent or teacher who believes the
child is capable of learning. It sounds so simple. Unfortunately,
as our children progress in education, there will be educators who
will focus only on presumed defects and limitations. Don’t let them.
Your child can learn. Your child will learn. Your job as a parent
is to remember this and to keep your focus on your child’s abilities.
B. Make Learning Fun
One of the most important principles of this program is that learning
should and can be fun. Because our children experience developmental
delays, learning takes longer. Unless we can make learning an enjoyable
experience, we are likely to meet with resistance from our children.
If learning is fun, our children will be engaged, enthusiastic and
motivated to learn.
C. Success is Key
“Success is Key” is another closely related principle. In addition
to having fun, our children need to feel successful in their attempts
to learn. If they feel successful, they will enjoy learning and
be inspired to learn more. If they feel only failure, they will
eventually feel defeated and avoid learning. Our children feel successful
when we use best practices for instruction, choose materials that
are appropriate, and account for individual learning strengths and
challenges.
D. Teach . . . Don’t Test
Another important program principle is that parents need
to teach, not test. When we teach, we give our children information
(“This word is ‘run’; this is ‘dog’”). When we test, we seek to
elicit information from our children. (“What is this word? What
is this letter?”). To use this program effectively, you will have
to resist the urge to make teaching sessions into testing sessions.
We will emphasize the differences between teaching and testing during
the monthly sessions, and we will help you learn to teach not test
as you work with your child.
E. Model. . . Don’t Correct
As your child learns, he will make mistakes. Remember to use a positive
approach to teaching by modeling correct responses rather than correcting
your child as each mistake is made (avoid phrases like “no, that’s
wrong,” “no, let me show you,” or “that’s not right”). Using a positive
approach, parents provide feedback based on their child’s effort
and not on whether the answer or response is “right” or “wrong.”
Ongoing modeling and encouragement are the best motivators for your
child.
F. Let Child Set Pace
We need to let our children set the pace of learning to implement
this program effectively. At times (perhaps too many times) it may
seem that progress is slow, and we as parents may become frustrated
by the lack of perceived growth. This is our problem, not our children’s.
Do you ever hear your child complain “Darn, it is taking me so long
to learn.” Of course not! Our children rarely seem discouraged by
the speed of their own progress – they are proud to complete each
task. Let us embrace their energy, go at their pace and suspend
our own pre-conceptions about how long it should take to master
a specific task. With our children guiding us, we can sit back,
have some fun and delight in their progress, regardless of the pace.
G. Balance Learning Time And Play Time
“All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.” This old
proverb has particular importance to parents hoping to grow life-long
learners. Balancing learning time and play time frees our children
for “childish” fun - fun without the weight of educational goals.
As parents, we are used to juggling crowded schedules and weaving
learning tasks into our daily routines. Quiet times become opportunities
to read or practice spelling words. Waiting in line becomes a chance
to skip count or recite addition facts. We have high expectations
for our children and find time to infuse our schedules with teachable
moments. This skill is important for successful instruction. Ample
play time, however, is just as critical. Our children work hard
in school, in therapy sessions and at home. They need time set aside
to relax and be kids. Schedule agenda-free play time if you have
to, but make sure it happens. Water fights, hide-and-go seek and
trips to the ice cream store are a few of the pleasures that take
the weight off the hours of work.
H. Don't Let Guilt Get in the Way
The introduction of a new program into our busy lives can be overwhelming
and, consequently, guilt-producing (“I missed another day of working
with my child”). Once guilt sets in, parents often quit entirely.
Don’t fall into that trap. Set a reasonable goal (15 to 30 minutes
three days a week) and add more time as you are able. Don’t worry
about missing a day, week or month now and then. Pick up where you
left off and continue working with your child. Have a good attitude,
and try not to feel burdened by this opportunity. This program can
be enjoyable for both you and your child if you set realistic goals
and don’t let guilt get in the way.
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